Introduction
Conflict in
places of work is evident at almost every place of work and in every
organization or company that has employees and is on the growth path. Conflict,
been a real or simply a thought out opposition of wants, needs, values or
interests is manifested in various ways and departments within the
organization. It is multifaceted and diverse. Companies have different ways of dealing
with conflict or minimizing the impact of it in the operations of the company. In
this paper I will look at and analyze a book: Resolving Conflicts at Work, by
Goldsmith and Cloke (2000). The book suggests ways of minimizing the impact of interpersonal,
organizational and technological conflicts. The writer notes that it is
important for a person to look at one self and try and fit in the social setting
of the workplace while accommodating behaviors, ideals and personal opinion of
others. I will also look at what conflicts I indentify and do not indentify with
and the ways I could deal with them and the suggestion I would give to others
faced by similar types of conflicts.
Theme
The
main focus of Goldsmith and Cloke (2000) is to help people to indentify the
areas of conflict that are within self in their pursuit for success. They say
that conflict is what a person can be able to see in the back of their minds
eye when they imagine looking deep into the underneath surface. What I unveil
is the conflict beneath me that makes me be remote controlled by them. If I
unveil such things as family misdeeds, past heartbreaks or I unveil a hidden
treasure within myself, it will define the path that I take and the association
that I develop with people everywhere especially the workplace where I am bound
to spend most of my time. The author believes that in every conflict there is
hidden agenda. This is termed the ‘iceberg of conflict’ and the author suggests
that I take a look at every stage that contributes to the current conflict.
According to Goldsmith
and Cloke (2000), it is important for me to understand the culture around which
I find myself in when involved or met by a certain conflict. They continue to
suggest that I should be aware of the manner in which to deal with conflict in
the different situations that it might occur. The way I deal with a particular
conflict in a Muslim country is not the same way I deal with it in a Christian
country. Or it is not possible to deal with old and young people at the same
time due to the generational gap. Therefore the authors encourage people to come
up with ways of handling unique situations in a unique way. They note that if I
do that people are bound to respond in a similar manner. I am also advised by
the author to be an opportunist in a conflict situation and to take advantage
of it. This is to ensure that I maximally benefit from the conflict.
The authors
place great emphasis on communication skills and how they affect positively or
negatively the impact of conflict. Poor communication they note, can affect the
way I handle a particular conflict and has the capacity to deteriorate the
conflict situation while good communication skills can serve as healing to a
conflict. Poor communication can also be the primary source of conflict
especially within the organization. Therefore the authors encourage me to focus
on improving communication techniques such as good listening and instantaneous
feedback. They also encourage me to follow the right channels of communication
and to make sure it systematically flows. Such techniques as emphasizing
instructions, validating claims and reframing statements are encouraged by the
authors as ways I could use to foster my communication skills (Goldsmith and
Cloke, 2000).
Emotions are a source
of conflict if they are concealed and released in a manner that negatively
affects association with others. The authors strongly advise me to look deep
inside me for those emotions and talk about them to people and this will
effectively remove them from my mind. Concealed emotions, the authors note,
serve to harm the need for good and effective communication and I should learn
to deal with it. I should learn to manage anger and other such emotions.
I am further
advised to look at what is important and separate them from the unimportant in
the resolution of a conflict. They note that a conflict is always muddled by an
unimportant part of it that if tackled, the conflict is resolved. The past may
be affecting the present or an option affecting a choice. The latter hinders
the operation of the former and hence a conflict arises. This should be my area
of focus and the base from which I handle the situation. There are bad behaviors
that I am bound to encounter when in my resolution of conflict. This am advised
by the authors should serve the purpose of fine-tuning my behavior. This will
include perseverance and patience and person to person empathy.
Technological
advancement and the dangers in our social and individual lives is main focus of
Goldsmith and Cloke’s book. It analyzes the benefits and the pitfalls that have
brought conflict in the society due to penetration of technology to almost, if
not all, aspects of human life. It is a speculative book that looks at the
reasons people are becoming uneasy day by day with a unique focus on the
Americans and the reasons that may be causing this malaise. Goldsmith and
Goldsmith and Cloke argues that technologies and high intellect marketing
coupled with instantaneous marketing has greatly cut costs for end user of a
product. It has also increased consumer taste and preferences. On the other
hand, according to Goldsmith and Cloke it has increased the level of the
insatiable nature of individuals to a new high. This has played havoc in
companies and almost every part of human life causing some form of frenzy and
hurriedness in life. Governments have also been affected in the seemingly fast
moving world where they have to contend with the speed that is there. This is a
reflection of how there is conflict between technology and the human beings.
The highest
paying jobs also are very demanding and they demand so much attention and great
creativity. According to Goldsmith and Cloke, who quit job as cabinet secretary
after realizing his job had occupied too much of his private time, leaving such
a job is viewed by many as a weakness and public trust betrayal. Therefore
there seems to be a conflict of personal and public interest and a choice has
to be made. This call for a human being to choose the best path and follow what
might not be detrimental as Goldsmith and Cloke did.
There is
greediness for high paying and socially highly regarded jobs. All this is to
satisfy a hunger for money and wealth according to Goldsmith and Cloke. This
makes people to neglect or to gladly outsource for services they would rather
do such as child rearing and house care and sometimes their husbands. In the
long run they start complaining they are paying too much in services and it was
their mistake in the first lace. I find that there are two conflicting
interests in me if that happens. It is my duty to evaluate the best alternative
and follow the right path.
Also Goldsmith and Cloke notably says that
companies nowadays need creative and resourceful minds. These employees are not
expected to last long in the companies as they seek to get greener and even
more lucrative pastures. This is a problem of people conflicting with
organizations and they end up being paid less since there is little expectation
in the long life of the company. Traditionally high paying jobs have become
less fashionable and employees in those dockets are getting lesser and lesser
payment because they can easily be replaced. Technology has allowed easy access
to education and reduced the rate of employment in some fields. This conflict
has resulted in the current situation and companies and multinationals have
taken advantage of that loophole to further their interests. This is a big
conflict as noted by Goldsmith and Cloke.
Goldsmith and
Cloke further notes that there is a personal and social choice for sustainable
life and an equally satisfying job that people are bound to make. This is
because the traditionally brushed aside luxuries have become necessities in the
world and particularly in America. For example it is hard to volunteer today at
work so as to have experience at work place because the need to pay bills and
to buy necessities such as computers will supersede the moral need to
volunteer. Breadwinners are not left behind as they try and work really hard to
live on the same level as others. Therefore I note that there is seemingly a
conflict between the rich and the poor, where the rich are in constant need to
stay at the top and the poor desire the good lives of the rich generating a
race towards being the best or reaching for the best.
Relation
and Action
The conflicts
and the sources of conflict discussed by the authors relate to my day today
experiences in a vast way. They are seen in school, workplaces and even in
families. In school I meet with people who will always complain that their dad
who passed away ten years ago is the source of their failure since he was a
drunkard and left nothing for their family at the time of death. This should
not be the case and it is paramount that they learn that the death of a person
should not be the reason we live in sheer regrets and not accomplish the goals
of today.
It is often a
common scenario to hear a friend complaining that their boss is too bad because
he hinders the development of them upwards in the company. The reason may be an
underlying issue of lapses in communication that hinders the relationship
between the two and therefore one views the other on a bad picture. It is
important for people and organizations to have good communication channels and
boundaries to enable effective vertical and horizontal communication and hence
growth of the organization and individuals.
The conflicts
described in the book relate so much to my life. My family is always working
and there is little that comes our way in terms of motherly and fatherly love.
This is also evident in the neighborhood I come from and there is no sign of
relenting. This is a pointer as to how conflict has emerged between satisfying
the needs of the employer, the family and the social needs. Though the family
and the social ones supersede the job requirements, people are simply drifting
away from their families. I find this wrong and it’s the high time that
individuals prioritized their needs and requirements.
Though the world
may revolve around the need to have all in life that make it comfortable, it is
the responsibility of a person to be able to stand the high moral ground and do
what is right for self and the society. This is because it is a prerogative for the measurement of
integrity. Legacy is what I will leave behind and my kids will know me for who
I am not what I want to be. Therefore in as much as I struggle to keep them at
par with the rest in the social ladder, the company that I offer to them will
be most remembered and the issue of social disintegration will not be there.
I find companies
and multinationals not doing what is right. They should be made to have a
minimum pay for each employee depending on the level of qualification. The
government should have policy that guides the remuneration of workers even in
the private sector no matter how big the position is. People should learn not
to be greedy and stay on one job to make companies attach a tag of remuneration
to that job. Public pressure should not be reason I should be made to stay on a
particular job. Personal timetable and reason should be the bench mark for me.
The embracing of technology has penetrated my life too. It is quite easy to
talk to a person at any part of the earth and it is equally easy to obtain a
product from whichever angle of the earth. This is quite good although it calls
for me and the rest to be careful not to fall in trap of harmful technology
that does not have security and harms morally. It is also important to use it
to maximum positive benefit.
The author
advises I look at the important and unimportant factors in life that affect my conflict
resolution genius. When I lost a game at the zonal having thought that I had
prepared well, I lost the impetus for practicing in hand ball again. Although
this still rings in my head as a reminder that I should practice, the fact that
I lost brings me down. I have learnt that I can separate that past failure from
my future ambition and be the best. I would also advise people to sift luggage
from unnecessary baggage and move on in a progressive manner.
In school and
every place including the social ones, culture is evident. People have
divergent cultures that shape their belief. I have learnt to accommodate and
respect that and not to allow that to be a source of misunderstanding between
us. This should be encouraged in an organization which is also a social place
with different people. This will foster growth and encourage understanding
which is good for the company. In schools it is also good to encourage that and
this will define the future peace of the world and families.
Conclusion
Goldsmith and
Cloke (2000) view conflict as an item in the society that each person has a
mandate to deal with at the individual level by focusing on areas that will
help them do that. This will help the person realize individual goals and at
the same time foster a culture of growth within self and organizations. In
their book they offer practical ways to help me and others to be able to do
that. That is the main focus of that book and it helps me to look at
experiences in my life that have been associated with conflict within self or
between people or organizations and to suggest to people ways to deal with them
based on the description offered by the authors.
Reference
Cloke, K. & Goldsmith, J. (2000). Resolving Conflicts at Work: A guide for
everyone on the job. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.
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